BREASTFEEDING Momma's ONLY!!! Would this piss you off?
Hi all! I am a breastfeeding, co-sleeping Mommy to a beautiful 14 month old baby boy. I have NO intention of weaning any time soon… As a matter of fact, I am going to allow my son to self wean. I am on a TON of medicines for high blood pressure (4 to be exact) and, I have to take an occasional medicine for pain as I was in a truly terrible car wreck and have 2 very messed up vertebrae in my back. Keep in mind that I do not over take anything and all of the medicines are approved in Dr. Hale’s book Medicine and Mothers Milk. I can’t tell you how many times I have been told that I should quit breastfeeding by some really ignorant people b/c of my high blood pressure issues. This group of morons even includes 3 doctors that I have been through (and fired).
Anyway, my neighbor was over the other day, I was feeding my little love bug and she made the following comment….
WOW, I CAN’T BELIEVE that you are still breastfeeding him! I breastfed my daughter for 6 months and switched to formula. So, I said: Why can’t you believe it? And she has the nerve to say: Because with all of the medicine that you are taking you are being very irresponsible. You are doing him more harm then good. Besides that, he’s too big and does not need it. So, of course I figured that it was her own guilt of giving her kid formula or whatever and politely said: You are wrong, it still does him a lot of good. I thought that was the end of it.
2 days later (the day before Christmas Eve), Social Services came to my home. CPS! And said they had an anonymous report that I was taking drugs and breastfeeding my son! I could not believe it! I showed them everything I was taking! To make a long story short, they apologized and left. 5 minutes later she came over asking what the police were doing at my house! She is totally acting like she had nothing to do with it! I asked her if she called and she said of course not. The thing is that there were no police at my house…. Just CPS and how the heck would she know that if she did not call? She lives behind me! I’m just so pissed right now! I would NEVER do anything to hurt my baby. If she thought I was such a bad person then why would she have me babysit her baby?
How the heck would you guys deal with this? I have been avoiding her and never want to talk to her again! If she thought that there was an issue and she is my friend, why not talk to me? What would you do? Am I wrong to be furious?
BLAIR and all else whom think it’s a bad idea to take medicine while breastfeeding. GET EDUCATED!!!! The only medicine that passes to the baby is medicine that attatches to your protien in your blood. Even if I were taking those kind of medicines, the baby would only recieve approx .001% of medicines which are considered SAFE. It is MUCH MORE DANGEROUS TO FEED MY CHILD FORMULA! Most doctors are UNEDUCATED when it comes to lactation/breastfeeding. Next time you go to your doctor ask how much education he went through for it. I checked not only with a Lactation Consultant, but also had my DOCTOR that admitted he was not educated check with Dr. Thomas Hale who is only the BEST pediatric pharmacologist on Earth. I did my research people! Now, do yours before you go to thinking that FORMULA is safer then breastfeeding while on medicine that is SAFE for breastfeeding.
OK… For those of you all that say I should have listened to the 3 doctors that told me not to breastfeed due to my high blood pressure. The first told me that it was PAIN related and that I should take MORPHINE regularly and that would bring my BP down. The second stated that my high blood pressures were DUE to breastfeeding… When I asked for PROOF of this, he could provide NONE. He himself admitted it was just a guess. The third wanted to prescribe medicine that WAS NOT safe for b/f’ding without even doing any research to find some that is safe. My doctor now and myself have spent hours upon hours becoming EDUCATED. I now see why she called CPS… The ignorance that some of you people have mirrors her own. I am not doing something because "some book" says that I can! I am giving my baby the BEST start in life possible, SAFELY, because I CAN!
As for taking medicines in combination, yes, they are safe too. AGAIN, I’VE DONE MY RESEARCH. AND YES, FORMULA IS THE DEVIL! IT IS POISON. For the person who said I’m a selfish mom for breastfeeding… All I can do is laugh at you! THANKS FOR CRACKING ME UP! I truly needed a laugh tonight!:-)! HEHEHE!
Tagged with: 3 doctors • anonymous report • baby boy • breastfeeding co • car wreck • christmas eve • cps • day before christmas • guilt • high blood pressure • matter of fact • medicines • mommy • month old baby • morons • mothers milk • nerve • social services • taking drugs • vertebrae
Filed under: how to lower blood pressure
As a mother you should have no feelings of guilt because you have checked out the medicine making sure it has no impact on the child and doesn’t transfer into the breast milk.
In the USA there is a culture of breasts are all sexual and should be hidden and not for a baby that long. This is just taboo and stereotyping. A child can self wean usually up to 2-3 years then switch to food. So I would not feel bad because you are actually giving your child nutritious milk that cannot be replaced with formula. Formula lacks specific nutrients and biological contents that help the child’s immune system and development.
The person who called the CPS I would just ignore or forget about it. Whoever did has a problem of their own and live in the belief that babies should be forced to be weaned off the breast or the idea that breasts are only sexual. You are taking a more natural approach and not a society prescribed approach that companies invented so they could sell formula.
If I was in your shoes I would be furious but understood that there is not much to be done about whoever called. Being negative and angry around the child isn’t a good idea. Let it go and enjoy your bundle of happiness and love that you created. Life is filled with challenges but overcome them with optimism not revenge. Support your child to the fullest extent and be happy.
I wouldn’t talk to her any more either.
U have every right to be furious. Piss her out of your life.
I would be furious too and be doing the same thing you’re doing you can’t really be friends with someone who doubts your ability to parent so much that they call CPS on you.
Honestly the meds sound like a bad idea. She should have asked you to see the book you are referring to if she wanted to be so nosy.
I’m angry just reading what you wrote
1) You really are putting your baby at risk. If some Dr. says you aren’t they are lying to you. 2) It isn’t your neighbor who called you in. 3) Your story doesn’t add up.. there is something you aren’t saying. But at this age, there is really no need to breast feed any longer especially since there is definitely a risk, no matter if it is small, to your child.
Nope, you’re right to be angry. Some doctors are not knowledgeable on what medicines are safe or not and go the "better safe than sorry."
I assume that either the Thomas Hale book or the LacMed website says that your medicines are safe.
I wouldn’t talk to her again either. Just tell her you know it was her and that you can no longer be friends with her because you don’t trust her.
"Am I wrong to be furious?"
No.
I mean, she has no idea what she’s talking about, so clearly she’s fantasized that you’re giving your baby some sort of poisonous milk, and probably thinks herself quite noble for having called CPS. Did it because she cares so much about your baby, etc.
End the friendship/acquaintanceship without apology. Maybe with some Dr Jack Newman handouts, but without apology.
Ooooh I would be LIVID! She would not be allowed in my house, and that’s that. I’d tell her that there were no police, she must be mistaken, and that if she knew anything about the people that were at my house then she knows exactly why the friendship has come to an end! I wouldn’t confront her, just refuse to visit or allow her in my home as politely as possible while letting her know that you don’t appreciate what she did.
Also, great job for checking Dr Hale’s!! For those that do not know, Dr Hale is the leading expert in medication and lactation, and his book "Medication and Mother’s Milk" is an index of every medication and its reaction in breastmilk, whether it’s safe for a breastfed baby or not.
i would be mad at that b**** but don’t be mad right now it will up your blood pressure.
you should do some revenge to her. there was no reason to freakin do that s***.
I would be furious! Good for you for continuing to breastfeed! I have been suffering through some pretty substantial allergic reactions and taking Claritan instead of Prednizone so that I can continue breastfeeding, Honestly, I would just ignore her. I doubt that she will ask you to watch her kid again if she was really worried about it.
i think personally..no im not a mother i am a man but i love children and babysit them all the time…no u are not wrong to be furious. and what i would do is stop breast feeding my baby and allow him to try regular baby food. as far as the medication goes i would try to see what some other doctors think and pull up some research on this dr.hale and make sure hes actually a professional…sorry if i offend you in any way by telling you to switch to baby food..and as far as your neighbor..tell her to piss off and find another babysitter for her children
I think that whoever reported you to CPS was very wrong indeed, but remember that it might not have been this woman!
However, you really should quit breastfeeding. Your son is well old enough to be weaned at this stage, and there’s no reason why he shouldn’t at all. It’s time to stop the breastfeeding, definitely. Don’t get annoyed at me for saying that, you shouldn’t ask the question if you can’t handle the answer.
Stop breastfeeding, it’s time!
Yes, I would be absolutely furious and would have nothing more to do with her, EVER. But I don’t know if there’s anything you can really do. My first thought was file a lawsuit against her, but then, I think there are laws that protect people who make allegations of child abuse, from being sued. You can let all the other moms in the neighborhood know what she did, too, so they can watch out for her.
Oh yeah, and don’t ever babysit for her child again, but I’m sure you know that. God only knows the things she could say about you.
I have no use for people like that. Good luck!!
First of all, she did talk to you and obviously did not like your answer.
Yes, it was terrible of her to call CPS on you and then act like she had nothing to do with it.
I would definitely avoid her forever!
But I do agree with her on the meds, in spite of all the things you read information changes daily on what meds hurt infants and what doesn’t. I was pregnant and working and was supposed to giving a child a nebulizer treatment twice a day (he was supposed to sit in my lap b/c he was totally hyper). I refused because I did not want to be inhaling the fumes while pregnant. Everyone said it was fine, well 11 years later I read that it is not fine and I am very thankful that I did not expose my child. I realize that is not what you want to hear, but you are exposing your child to a lot of drugs that he doesn’t need second hand.
That was totally not her biz in the first place and I had an LC who would encourage mothers to BF for NO LESS than 18 months.
Some doctors are not as well informed about BFing because of the availability of formula and many, including my ped, have incentives from manufacturers to push their brand of formula.
You seem well enough informed to know that what you are doing is perfectly safe. If there was something wrong from your meds your ped would let you know and there are likely alternative meds you could use if needed.
I’m sorry your neighbor sucks and wish you and your baby the best!
People. How can you say her taking the medicines are wrong? You don’t even know the names of the medications she is taking!!!MAJORITY of medications are perfectly fine while breastfeeding. DO your own research, for the love of GOD!
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Anyways to your original question. I would be beyond pissed. Tell her you know she is the one who called, and she is no longer welcome in your home. That is such b.s.!
You sounds like a great mom! I have only been bfing for 6 months, and I know the love and effort that goes into it! Your doing an amazing thing for your child!!
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TO: AlwaysOnTheBSide
Lol, hunny you are 14. You are trying to tell a grown woman with her own child about breastfeeding. Please do your own research. Since the beginning of times toddlers have been breastfed, and still recieve many benefits from nursing.
Also most babies do not even self wean until 18 months. Please know something about bfing, before you comment on it. : )
take her at her word if she says she didn’t call. maybe she is just concerned about the well-being of the baby, not totally a bad thing.It means she cares. Personally i think breastfeeding should end when the baby grows teeth and can eat real food. But its a free country and if you aren’t hurting anyone ( I don’t know if taking certain drugs affects the milk, i’m sure you do though or you wouldn’t be doing it.) then just tell her its your decision and the baby’s not being hurt, so… thanks for your concern, but i got it under control.
oh I would be sooo ticked!!!!!
you have every right to be pissed! every right especailly since you’ve done your research on each drug you are taking… plus the fact that your son’s pediatritician would have let you know if your son wasn’t developing properly…
I’d probably confront her [but then I'm confrontational] but I’d end the friendship…. and if she askes… just tell her to ask CPS
http://www.babycenter.com/0_drug-safety-during-breastfeeding_8790.bc
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oh and why is it that people think that just because you are still bfing at this age that your baby/toddler is only bfing and not eating food….?
toddlers still get bottles at this age….are they not eating food as well? Bfing toddlers also eat real food! so lay off that!
sorry it was a comment some guy above made and ticked me off
Im sure you are a great mother and totally agree the neighbor should of minded her business. On a personal note I completely agree with her. You SHOULD NOT be breastfeeding while on medications I mean HELLO?? three different doctors told you the same thing and just because some book said it was ok, well that book does not know your and your 14th too old baby to be breastfeeding btw.
Sorry if I sound rude but I can not stand mothers who are selfish. You should stop breastfeeding because you obviously need the meds and your baby is way big enough to eat without the boob…..
ok calm down – this is NOT helping your blood pressure!!!
Its ok to be furious – however unless you can prove it was her, its not fair to accuse her of this based on speculation … so… get the bull by the horns and ask her.
Tell her that you think its too much of a coincidence that she said these things to you, and 2 days later CPS turned up … ask her directly, ‘Did you call Child protection?’ and if she denies it … tell her ‘ if you say no, i believe you (BS! But you need to say this!) … but i would prefer it if you would not make personal comments about whether or not i breastfeed on my medication in the future.’
Also you might ask her if she knows who did. Its clearly related to her in some way.
There are 2 ways to go about this – and i think the direct approach is the best. The other is to just let it eat you up… or go to the police and get a harassment claim about whoever submitted the complaint. However if it was anonymous, its difficult to trace it.
If you still think your so called friend did this ( and if she denies it ) then it might be worth finding new friends. It does sound like she did call – but this is just speculation. You dont know … for example maybe she told her friend / mother / sister / neighbour about your story, and THEY reported you?
Either way i wouldnt shirk around it – your pissed, and rightly! So let her know … maybe you should join a group like La Leche League or something too – they will be able to offer a kind ear and support to you, and in such a difficult situation it may be well worth it to have these kind of friends instead.
Also … if the medication is ok (by your DOCTOR – not a writer like Dr Hale – anyone can get a PHD online!!!) you might want to get a written statement about the drugs you are taking (stating they are ok!) so you have them available for evidence. Although i think you shouldnt have to justify yourself, for some people medical evidence goes a long way – and shoving a notice saying ‘these drugs are ok’ in peoples faces, is the best way to shut them up on the spot. Its medical evidence VS their opinion!!!
Good luck … your right to be furious though! Try to calm down! Your a great mum and you are doing whats right for your baby … talk solice in that!
I would be absolutely livid. I know some that have issues with extended breast feeding, but your son is only 14 months. The world health organization recommends breast feeding into the second year and a new study has shown that another batch of antibodies are passed down to baby in your milk at 18 months so it’s wise to nurse until at least then. Good for you to check your meds for safety, so many women think they can’t nurse because of meds that are perfectly safe. I would cut my loses with her and move on. We all have an obligation to call authorities if we think a child is in danger but for goodness sake make sure you know what you’re talking about before you call, their are children out there that really need help don’t waste CPS time that could be spent on legit cases.
HOLY CRAP! I would flip out on her.
It is your own choice how long you breastfeed and if the medicine is said to be fine with breastfeeding then whatever.
Some people are just so ignorant. I can’t believe she would go that far.
I have no advice about what to do about her because I would just flip out on her.
me? i’d laugh in their face and remind them of their ignorance.
i DARE someone to say something about me nursing my son who is 20 months, just DARE them. next time she comes around say something along the lines of " some ignoramus called CPS and reported me for breastfeeding my son taking medicine that is approved while breastfeeding, what a dumbass huh?"
CRIBBER- the WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION recommends 2 yrs of breastfeeding- she know what she is doing and MOST medication are safe while breastfeeding esp as only about 2% gets into your milk. The AAP recommends a MINIMUM of one year
no ones business but yours! if your dr says its ok then its ok! I wouldnt talk to her anymore. OH WELL!!! It is her loss. Dont give in to this, this is not her business. Your the mom. Not her.
I stopped breastfeeding at 11 months because my baby kept biting me HARD with her new teeth. YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT…this is AMERICA—LAND OF THE FREE!
WOW
I would be BEYOND furious! What an idiot!
I would have her added to baby action’s mailing list and send her a LOAD of crap on how formula kills 1.5 million infants each year!
Is there a way you can report her for that? IDK what it’d be called, but its abusing the system.
I am not aware of the medications that you are taking, and even if the book you have says that they are safe to take while breastfeeding, does it also list the consequences of taking so many medications at one time? Even though individually they are all safe, they may be harmful when combined.
Also, THREE doctors have told you that you should stop due to the blood pressure issues… they are medical professionals, so I think that you should really listen to them on this!
In regards to the question about the neighbor, I would be angry with her for calling CPS, but she has the child’s best interest at heart! You want to know why she did not talk to you about it, but in your own question, you say that she brought it up to you in conversation, in which you told her that she was wrong! So she did try to talk to you, but you are so closed-minded on the issue, that you did not want to listen to the things that she was saying (and you did not want to listen to the doctors when they told you the same thing). You just keep looking for people to validate your opinion, but you aren’t going to get that from me!
I wouldnt be her friend anymore. Thats horrible of her. You have every right to be furious.
tell her to get the F out!
Your taking the medicine and breastfeeding because a book says you can?
You should consult with a doctor.
If you want to breastfeed your son at 14 months of age then so be it..nothing wrong with that but I doubt that women felt guilty because she switched to formula. Formula isn’t the devil.
I think that women may have gone overboard when calling cps. It doesn’t sound like she knows exactly what your taking or anything of the sort.
How about looking at it this way, anything that can be passed through breast milk should not be ingested or you should stop breastfeeding. That is why you cannot drink alcohol and breast feed and a lot of other stuff. If some dr. says its okay and others say it is not, I would err on the side of caustion to protect my baby. With that said, if you truly feel like your friend lied be a friend like you expected her to do wiith you. Tell her that you respect her opinion but will not always agree with it. You feel like she did call CPS and you thought more of your friendship. Tell her you thought she was mature enough to come to you with her concerns and handle them like an adult. Give her your few and say, I hope not to revisit this issue again.
i would be beond pissed and i wouldn’t talk to her anymore, if she could do this then she is not a true friend
I would fill a brown bag with dog poop set it on fire on her doorstep, ring the door bell and run. I was furious just reading that. As a late Christmas gift, give her Dr.Hale’s book.
That’s terrible! Don’t talk to her ever! I definitely think she is guilty for not breastfeeding. I am glad CPS left you alone.
Don’t talk to her ever again.
The fact that CPS looked into it, apologized for wasting your time and left means that this case doesn’t have merit. So this Y!A debate is pointless.
If she is really ignorant about the situation, she probably thought that she was saving your baby. There needs to be more people willing to do this and we wouldn’t have the Baby P cases in this world.
However, that’s what my rational brain says right now. If I were in the situation, I’d probably be pissed.
Why do you think that you, and a book are better "Educated" than 3 qualified Drs? I do hope you’re not doing your son harm by pumping him with drugs, but when you realise that you probably have, will you feel guilty then?
Formula isn’t "poison" you bigotted idiot, if someone genuinely cannot breastfeed, or a mother DIES in childbirth, formula is necessary, what do you suggest, we let the babies just die?